Thursday, March 11, 2010

They're BACK!!!

Spring has sprung and our Skunk is back. Although the actions of the Milwaukee Animal Control office was significantly helpful in curtailing Squirrel Man from putting out his infernal corn and veggies and every other pest attraction he had, it would appear that the skunk enjoyed her cushy hole under my garage so much last year that she returned for another season. Alas…not last year’s hole but a new hole closer to the sidewalk. That way she can spray us without having to leave the comfort of her hole.

I cannot tell you how happy I was this winter that the flock of birds that would fly from tree to tree around Squirrel Man’s yard waiting for bird feed and such disappeared. Our cars in previous winters were targets of unrelenting and targeted bird bombings that delivered more ammunition on our cars than a drive-by on the north side. The amount of corn buried in our yard and growing corn stalks this year was minimal to none because the squirrels dwindled down to typical city levels after their gluttonous corn fest ended. Our fence remains standing because they didn’t eat my fence all winter. Why even the snow in the back yard remained pristine and untouched all winter without a super-highway of squirrel and bunny tracks.

This is why all yards should be Astroturf like the Brady’s yard. My skunk garden should just be paved over and install artificial flowers. This is the way nature was intended for the city. Prepare for death this season Pepe. Yeah…LeDead….mort..fin.

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